How was my day? | April 3, 2017

I hugged almost 20 people today.There were males too. Half I just met today. I handshook almost 10 people. I got to talk to 5 people randomly face to face and got to share random stories. I made new friends and acquaitances. Been overwhelmed to know their stories. I enjoyed different activities. I failed to make and blow a balloon but lucky enough to got someone make it for me. Got a chance to hug one of my crushes, take note I was just up for handshake but he was the one to hug me. *giggles* on the other hand, I didn't got the chance to hug nor handshake my other crush. But it's okay. I was laughing the whole day. I've managed to make them laugh with my jokes. MC liked my "amazing" expression, I was rewarded with a box of chocolate. Got a chance to ate in an expensive restaurant. Got to experience a sunny and windy atmosphere up the penthouse, got to see the skyline and the breathtaking view of the city. Drank beer while waiting for the sunset, chilling from the cold breeze.

I was happy. Really happy. I enjoyed my day.
Yet the moment I got home, laid my aching tired back on my warm bed, sadness starts to fill in again. My eyes worn out of shine and became dull. I feel empty. Pain and hurt starts to engulf my whole being like a deadly tiny scorpions puncturing my weakened body. The emotions I keep to myself is as dark as the midnight. Feelings were as cold as the breeze of dawn. My mind is howling like wild wolves, giving shivers to my wandering existence. My eyes hurt as I close my eyes. I'm starting to feel dizzy. I think the alcohol went straight to my veins, yet I wanted to drink again. I want to sleep fast so that I can start to feel happy again by tomorrow sunrise. So that I can add another day on my countdown. Another day to pass means another life to surpass. A mechanical step to survive this cruel world. My lungs hurt as I heave another sigh. Oh this temporary happiness of mine. Was any in this world ain't temporary? I will leave this question hanging, just like how I'm currently feeling. Hanging. By the cliff. Torn between dying or holding. Or perhaps I could choose neither. Yes. No more sacrificing. Wait til you see me, flying.

(c) Enjaye Riyu | April 3, 2017